AT LEAST THEY CAUGHT IT EARLY

I remember hearing on NPR the end of an interview with a woman whose husband was stationed with the US Military Troops in Afghanistan. She talked about how she would shrink each time someone would say, “Well, at least he’s not in Iraq.” The comment did nothing to console her, although she kindly assumed that’s how it was meant. Instead it embarrassed her, belittled her, and sometimes made her really angry.

I think I know how she feels. Seems each time I tell someone of my diagnosis, I get the same response, “Well at least they caught it early.” To myself, and sometimes even out loud, I answer, “Yes, thank God.” Although I’m not yet sure that I believe that…one that they got it early, pretty sure that they didn’t get it all, and definitely not thankful yet that I HAVE CANCER!!! Doesn’t anybody believe me, can’t anyone bear to let me mourn this abnormal uncontrolled process going on deep inside, microscopically invading normal tissue, the normal tissue that once housed my beautiful two children? OK. So (hopefully) I’m not going to die from this, but do I have to be thankful…already?

I shared my frustration with my husband. “You know what’s more annoying,” he asked, only half kidding I think, “is when people get so wrapped up in themselves they can’t see when someone’s just trying to be nice.” Ouch.